The problem with beautiful women

Words to live by, from Anagrams by Lorrie Moore:

The problem with a beautiful woman is that she makes everyone around her feel hopelessly masculine, which if you’re already male to begin with poses no particular problem. But if you’re anyone else, your whole sexual identity gets dragged into the principal’s office: “So what’s this I hear about you prancing around, masquerading as a woman?” You are answerless. You are sitting on your hands. You are praying for your breasts to grow, your hair to perk up.

I look at all the pretty girls, and in my head I grumble, “If I had your face, I would go out and break hearts.” Especially your face, yes, you. I want to curl your hair and put you in a summer dress, dammit. [Today, I am wearing heels that shoot me up to just a smidge over six feet. I feel like flamingo. But without the cheery pinkness. And the saucy behind.] Happy Monday, everybody.

2 thoughts on “The problem with beautiful women

  1. Oh, don’t be too jealous of those saucy behinds. They get you nothing but stares and cat calls from passing guys. *rolls eyes*


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